Escape Artists and CBS Films.

Written By: Kate Angelo

Oh, Jennifer Lopez. Bless your heart for trying. After a 4-year hiatus from the big screen, and 5-years since her last prestige picture, J.Lo goes all in on a comeback with “The Back-Up Plan”, a romantic dramedy about a single woman who has been single long enough and decides to have a baby on her own. A simple enough premise and perhaps, in more able hands, a film that would find some life and rise above its formulaic trappings and stand on its own as a well-made and entertaining film. I sincerely hope that in a tough year professionally for Lopez, she truly does have a career back-up plan, as this particular “…Back-Up Plan” serves as a major disappointment, in long stretches is rather unlikable, and sadly will not be the restoration J.Lo is hoping for.

Lopez stars as Zoe, a single pet-store owner who is tired of thinking she has found the right guy, only to be disappointed time and time again. Worried that time is beginning to pass her by, she schedules an artificial insemination with her OB-GYN (an amusing Robert Klein), and anticipates a successful fertilization. Hopping into a cab, Zoe is joined by a stranger who argues that Zoe stole his cab. Of course, this stranger, Stan (Alex O’Loughlin), is handsome and charming and soon Zoe has an unwanted companion traveling with her on her way back to work.

On a trip to the local Farmer’s Market with her best friend, Mona (Michaela Watkins), Zoe learns that Stan is a cheese vendor and that he has inherited his family’s farm. After a few dates and quickly falling head over heels for one another, Zoe shares with Stan her pregnancy and unfortunately, the news is more than Stan can take. But, he also has fallen for Zoe and agrees to stay with her and make an effort to make the relationship work.

Whether they make it or not is an obvious conclusion to draw here, as Kate Angelo’s script is stock and assembly line in execution. Palpable chemistry does exist early on between Lopez and O’Loughlin, and their initial courtship scenes play well. Then, in a rather puzzling decision, the middle portion of the film takes a rather unlikable turn as Zoe fails to trust anything that Stan tries to do, Stan gets angry because of it, and then everyone close to Zoe begins lecturing her about pushing everyone close to her away. At this moment, I didn’t care about Zoe at this stage in the film or come anywhere close to connecting to her situation because I actually found myself siding with Stan. And Zoe’s friend, Mona. And her Nana (Linda Lavin from the 1970′s sitcom, ‘Alice’!!!). And the single mother’s support group which consider kicking her out once she strikes up a relationship. I cannot remember a leading character in a rom-com that I disengaged from so easily than this one.

The film’s look and feel as a TV movie is only amplified by supporting performances by lots of television stars. Remember Sookie from “The Gilmore Girls”?. She’s here. Howard Cunningham, the dad from “Happy Days”? Present. Rachel from “One Tree Hill”? Yep. As stated above, they even found Alice from the 1970′s sitcom, “Alice”. That earns the film a half-star right there. While slight, many of the supporting performances are entertaining and keeps the film watchable.

“The Back-Up Plan” throws away its engaging and sweet beginnings for a contrived and hackneyed film that left me shaking my head. And it is a shame because while Jennifer Lopez’s career is not in freefall, it does feel as if she needs this movie to do well. In her defense, Lopez is trying really hard to make this work and I tend to think the film is less her fault and more the decisions made by everyone else.

Again, in more able hands…

Should I See It?

YES

Romantic comedies are always going to have a built-in audience, and if you are a fan – well, here you go.

Even with its themes of single-mother pregnancy, the film stays soft and light and avoids any statement on any such topic.

TV fans will enjoy the TV supporting role parade on display…

If you enjoy seeing movie women in their second and third trimester wear expensive clothes, gain only stomach weight, while retaining flawless makeup and hair styling.

NO

Why pay for a film the quality of something that you can find on cable television channels like Hallmark Movies, ABC Family, or Lifetime?

A maddening and frustrating middle and end becomes even more maddening and frustrating when you stop and think about why these characters seem to care about a woman so imbalanced.

Jennifer Lopez remains the hottest woman on the planet, pregnant, with flawless hair and makeup in every scene – including, perhaps, the birth scene. (Sigh…)